Taunts

As I lie beside the man of my dreams

That I love with every fiber of my being

I look down at the ring around my finger

It makes me smile

I then fight the tears

I look to my sleeping husband

His calm face and peaceful breathing remind me of better times

Times when we talked and laughed

But now it is shallow remarks and hallow smiles

I look passed him to our bedside table

The smiling people in the photo are starting to feel more like taunts than fond memories

Reminding me

"He used to love you"

Making me wonder, can I do this?

I know I will fight

But can I win?

Goodnight

Back in my 10ft tall bed
Thinking back in my head
How my life used to be
Before there was a you and me
How my stuffed bear
Was the only thing I held with care
But with this ring on my finger
My thoughts tend to linger
On how someday I'll be your wife
And my bear will be replaced by you for life
But for now I'll hold him tight
And dream of you till the morning light.

Shattered Glass

Shattered glass on the floor

My eyes glance back to the door

What if I ran away?

From all my wants and dreams that ran astray

I want happiness it’s all I asked

But all I have is broken glass

The shard of glass breaks the skin

Blood pours out and starts to mend

That’s how we’re built to start anew

Start the healing process, the scars we’ll have a few

Reminders of the battles we’ve fought

Reminders that it wasn’t all for not.

Turn It Up

Turn up the music

Drown your demons out

Turn it up louder

Dance like crazy

Watch a smile appear

Freak your demons out

All this pain

And yes I can still be light hearted

I can still be innocent

I can still be me

Watch me love with open arms

No matter if your holding a knife or not

I will still be here

Cut me if you need

Whatever makes you smile

I will be fine I have me

I need your smile

So pain is becoming my friend

My heart is still light

I love the pain

Its becoming normal

So just turn up the music

And we’ll play this song again

Our First Valentine’s Day

It is our very first valentine’s day my love

And I’ve not a clue what to buy you

I thought maybe a dove

But those are a bit pricey.

I’m sorry to say my love,

But I am a little bit broke.

I thought of taking you to The Cove,

But that’s in the Bahamas and we don’t have passports.

I thought maybe a simple golf glove,

But you have enough of them.

The only thing I could conceive a thought of,

Even possibly giving you,

Would be my love.

But, my dearest blue eyes, you have that,

That, and everything else that I could possibly consist of.

Maybe someday I can give you the world,

But until that day, I will simply have to give you my love.

I do hope that our very first valentine’s day,

Will be memorable even though we cannot give what we feel each other deserve of

But you are enough my Kevin, you are all I truly need

For you are my one and only, true love

our love is stronger, we can't forget that

I talk like i'm fine

But my heart beats faster
And tears the brim my eyes

I then remember remember why I'm scared

Saying it out loud makes it more real

Everything is fine

But I feel like this is just the beginning

I'm doing my best to stay positive

But I'm fearful of losing it all

I love to hard to let it slip away

I'm fighting

But it's hard to tell when I have to be silent

Can you tell?

That I'm fighting for you?

That I am the one for you?

I'm the one who will help you

I'll build you up

I will never tear you down

I want you the best you can be

I believe that you can be whatever you choose

I believe in your dreams

I'm the one that holds you when ur sick

Helps you when ur hurt

Holds ur hand you when your lost

Kisses your lips when ur worried

I am the one who is here for you

Being and doing what I can for you

That is what makes me happy

Your love?

It fills me to the top with happiness

When you hold me

My worries vanish

When you talk to me

I feel free

I'm fighting for us

Because baby we are a great team

And I know that all she wants to do is hurt you

She has a good hold upon you

But our love is stronger

I waiver sometimes

And I cry because it hurts

Baby we can handle this

Please just hold my hand

And we can do anything

Just trust me

My fears, my pain, my love

Your eyes cruel, your words daggers, your lips poison, your kiss addictive, your whisper intoxicating, you are my drug, the more I fight to run away, the more of a hold you have upon me. You are my murderer you are my life you are mine.